Photographs
by thechickening
Summary: Apparently a picture is worth a thousand words, but that might not be enough to describe each photo in this album. They look through photo albums and recall some of the most memorable times in their lives. AU. Kind of like a bunch of snapshots of their life together. Rating will most likely change to M at some point.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N:**

 **this idea just kind of came to me. i don't think i've seen a story like this but maybe i'm subconsciously stealing the idea, so let me know if someone already did a story like this. essentially it's going to be alex looking through photo albums and the story behind each photo. the italics represent memories and the regular font is present tense. i don't usually like writing so much in italics but i'm not sure how else to separate the past and present. if anyone has any ideas i'm all ears :)**

 **i'm not abandoning PWTLO! but i'm a little stuck there and i wanted to get this on paper before i lost it in the mess that is my brain.**

 **i didn't mean for this first chapter to be so christmasy but it just kind of happened. i hope you guys like it!**

I traced my fingers over the spines of the albums carefully, as if pushing too hard would somehow taint the memories that they held. I knew exactly which photos were in each album but I read the perfect cursive writing on the labels anyways. When she put them together I never understood why she put so much effort into it. _Babe, we're just going to look at the pictures. It doesn't matter how pretty each page is,_ I would tell her. Now it made me smile, though, as I thought back to her sitting in front of the fireplace right after we moved in, using the glue gun and her fancy scissors for hours on end to make the perfect scrapbooks. I looked over at the little spot on the carpet that had hardened after she forgot to turn off the glue gun and it dripped onto the floor. It used to bother me, but now every little stain and dent just brought a smile to my face because it was so _her_ to leave her flat iron on all day and melt the trim on the sink or try to mount the damn TV while I was gone but completely miss the stud and rip a hole in the wall. Of course we repaired most of the damage but I could still see each mark she left behind over the years.

I grabbed one of my favorite of the albums and took a seat in front of the fireplace where she had sat so many years ago putting it together. I had the entire album memorized from front to back, but I could still spend days on end flipping through the pages. The cover was a dark brown leather and had various marks and bends in it. It was the first one she made after we moved in together and it was definitely the most well put together of the many albums she had created over the years. She had a habit of pittering out rather quickly when it came to projects like this. I opened the cover carefully and traced my fingers over the first page that was trimmed with a film pattern carefully cut out of black cardstock. The page consisted of two movie tickets to see _Castaway_ in theaters and a strip of photos from the booth at the theater. It was one of our first cliché dates.

 _I sat on the couch and tapped my foot impatiently as I listened to Piper humming a Backstreet Boys song (_ yeah, I know, but it was 2001 and I couldn't find anything she did annoying _) while she got ready in her bathroom. We had about an hour to get to the theater so we weren't in too much of a hurry, but I didn't want to miss the movie. And she_ knew _I would be here at 6, so she should have been ready 14 minutes ago. But as impatient as I was, I still couldn't find it in myself to be mad at her. Even my worst pet peeves were endearing when she was the culprit._

 _"-so I think it would be best if we take a cab because parking might take a while and it shouldn't take too long to get one." Piper emerged from her bathroom and looked at me expectantly. Her blue eyes were so huge and innocent looking and her stick straight hair just begged to be touched. Her makeup was a little more heavy-handed than usual and it just made those enticing eyes even more irresistible._

 _"Were you talking to me? Because I didn't even hear you until the part about the cab." I tried to play it cool and keep up the nonchalant attitude that I pulled her in with, but I was having trouble holding back my grin. So fucking cute._

 _"Oh. I was saying that the weather is too bad to walk. Don't you think?" She looked at me like I held all the answers to the world. I could probably tell her we should swim there and she would go put on my favorite bikini. I was her personal guide through everyday life and we had only met months ago._

 _"Probably," I glanced out the window and looked at the dusting of snow on the ground. "Cab it is."_

 _I already had my shoes on because I didn't expect her to take so long to get ready, so I grabbed her jacket while she hopped on one foot to get her other tennis shoe on. It was just a movie date, so we didn't get too dressed up. Most of the dates we had gone on so far had been to exclusive clubs or expensive restaurants, but Piper insisted that we do something a little_ less fancy _as she put it. Worked for me._

 _I helped her put on her favorite snow jacket and we walked down the stairs side by side. When I opened the door she immediately shivered and it brought a smile to my face. She was_ always _cold. It was understandable though, because it was only a week after Christmas and it was freezing outside. I put my arm around her and stepped out toward the sidewalk, immediately successful in hailing a cab. I held the door for her to enter first and, as usual, those WASPy manners caused her to thank me for my action that most people just considered common courtesy. She sat on my left and stared out the window as I stared at her. Her eyes followed various cars and occasionally looked up to the sky to watch the small snowflakes fall. The way she was amazed by such simple things made my heart swell in my chest and gave me a weird feeling in my stomach._

 _When we arrived I quickly paid the driver before she could pull out her money. Piper had this adorable thing where she would try to pay for stuff even though we both knew I was way better off than her at her current jobless state._

 _"So I heard this movie is supposed to be really good. I mean obviously Tom Hanks is in it so it's going to be good, but yeah." She always seemed to have trouble ending sentences properly and usually trailed off or threw a "yeah" on the end to complete her statements. I laughed and pulled her toward the photo booth._

 _"You wanted a sappy date? I'll give you a sappy date." I took a seat and guided her next to me. She squinted her eyes and read the instructions._ Sheread the instructions on thephoto booth _._

 _"Stop reading the instructions! You just have to pose."_

 _"Don't we have to press a button or something?" She was still trying to read the instructions with her brows furrowed but it was dark due to the curtains surrounding us and she clearly couldn't see anything._

 _"No, it just goes off a few seconds after we pay." As if on cue, the light flashed._

 _"I wasn't ready!" She shouted this as if there was a little person inside that should have warned her and now owed her a new picture. Then, just in time, she threw on her practiced grin exposing most of her teeth and creating those adorable dimples in her cheeks that just begged to be pinched. I looked right at her, barely remembering the camera even existed. The flash went off again. I pulled her in for a kiss because that's what couples do in these things. She just smiled against my lips._

 _"You have to kiss me," I mumbled against her lips wanting to get her that cliché picture we both knew she wanted, but it was too late and the flash went off again. She started kissing me then, probably realizing that the picture was of her smiling against my lips but I decided that she had already blown her chance at that picture and pinched her side, causing her to immediately break out into laughter which immediately made me to join her. The flash went off for the last time._

I looked at each photo in great detail. The first one was hilarious. Her brow was furrowed and her eyes narrowed. She looked so _determined_ for being in a photo booth. I was looking at her with a smirk on my face, so the picture was of my profile. She was looking a little below the camera and it showed off her carefully applied makeup. It was fun to think back to the days when we would work so hard applying eyeliner and mascara and eye shadow just to go to the movies. Now she usually went without makeup and I only applied my usual eyeliner because we didn't care what anyone else thought anymore.

In the second picture I pretty much looked the exact same. I briefly wondered how much of my time I spent looking at her instead of the world around me, but then I realized that I _still_ do that and it wasn't going to change any time soon. That familiar smile was plastered on her face and I took time to look at the details, from the crinkle in her nose to the glint in her eye and even though this was her _photo smile_ she was radiant. The smile hadn't changed much over the years. A few laugh lines appeared over time but those teeth were still as white as snow and remained straight as ever, and her eyes still had that familiar glint that never seemed to go away.

In the third picture was our profiles, hers smiling with her eyes open putting her long eyelashes on display. My lips were puckered in an attempt to receive a chaste kiss, eyes shut as I waited for her to return it.

The fourth photo was one of my favorites. Her head was completely thrown back exposing her neck which showed off a rather impressive hickey that I had given her the night before. Her eyes were squeezed shut and her mouth was wide open. Her cheeks were a little more pink than in the previous photos and her hair was tousled. I was laughing too, facing the camera with my head tilted toward her. My eyes were directed sideways at her and both of my arms were reached over to her side of the booth as I poked and prodded her relentlessly.

I thought back to how hard she had cried just an hour later when Tom Hanks called out for Wilson and how it made my chest hurt so bad that I almost cried too, but not because of the movie. Thinking back, that was the first time I ever saw her cry. I always thought it was funny when people cried during movies but seeing her look so sad made me dig my fingernails into my palms and clench my jaw to try to keep my shit together. I remembered reaching for her hand and she turned to look at me and all I could see was her protruding lower lip and watery eyes. Her makeup was a disaster now and she sniffled like a little kid and I couldn't tell if it made me want to laugh or cry, so I busied myself fixing her makeup and wiping the tears off her cheeks.

I made a note to myself to suggest _Castaway_ for our next movie night as a tribute to our first movie date together. That would make her day.

I flipped to the next page and even though I knew what was coming I broke out into laughter. The pictures were taken a few weeks after our movie date from the first page. There were detailed paper snowflakes and I thought back to when Piper had made them.

 _I walked in the door and instead of my normal greeting I could hear the snipping of scissors over the crackling of the fireplace that was_ _ **always**_ _on._

 _"Pipes?" I called out as I dropped the grocery bags on the floor outside of the kitchen. She hated when I didn't immediately unload the groceries, but I was going to do it before everything thawed out so she would get over it. I was more curious to see what she was up to than anything. Apparently she didn't even notice me, though, because when I peeked around the corner she didn't look up. She was sitting cross legged in the spot in front of the fire that we always fought over with her hair in a messy bun on top of her head. The bun was kind of pointless, though, because as she looked down her hair almost completely curtained her face. She snipped away at a folded white piece of paper carefully but quickly, sending tiny white pieces of paper fluttering across the carpet. I briefly wanted to run over and tell her to at least put a towel down to catch the pieces but I wouldn't dare interrupt her right now - I was having way too much fun watching her concentrate. She eventually unfolded the paper and lifted her head up to see what she had created. A proud expression was on her face and she rotated the shape around in her fingers and held it up to the light. Apparently satisfied, she used the glue stick to carefully press it onto the page before starting on another._

 _I realized she could be at this for hours so I made my presence known, walking toward her with a smile on my face._

 _"When did you get here?" She looked up at me like I was the center of her universe._

 _"I don't know, a few minutes ago." I saw Piper glance over at the grocery bags on the floor and back at me and I sighed, redirecting my focus to putting the food away._

It was almost impressive how wrapped around her finger I had been. She hadn't even needed to say anything and I immediately did what she wanted me to do. Then I realized that it was still this way and probably would be for the rest of our life together.

There were 6 photos on the open pages in my lap. There were her snowflakes and white and blue glitter completely covering the page. It almost looked like a Christmas card made by a child but it was too carefully constructed to be true. I returned my focus to the photographs laid out on the page.

 _It was the first_ real _snow since we had started dating. She was from Connecticut so she was used to the weather. I, on the other hand, moved around frequently as a child. Somehow, I had never ended up anywhere that got more than a few inches of snow. So when I woke up in her bed that morning, alone as usual because she could never seem to sit in one place for more than a few minutes, I was definitely awestruck as I looked out the window. I didn't bother calling out for her because, as small as her apartment was, she was always too wrapped up in a task to notice. I gave myself about 5 minutes to wake up before finding my glasses and going to see what she was up to now._

 _When I got out to the living area she was curled up on the couch with a white blanket (somehow it had managed to stay perfectly white despite how clumsy and messy she could be) with a cup of either hot chocolate or coffee on the coffee table. More like cold chocolate, actually, because she was snoring like she usually does when she sleeps in a weird position and had clearly been out for a while. The blanket was wrapped around her back and tucked under her feet and she looked like a little snowball sitting on that old couch that we both loved so much. I glanced over at the TV to see the menu to_ How the Grinch Stole Christmas _(the Jim Carrey version that made her snort with laughter at almost every scene) replaying itself over and over. It was weeks past Christmas but the movie was still new and I had a feeling it was one she would never get sick of_ (And I was right because she has watched it at least every couple months since we bought it back in early 2001.)

 _I grabbed her cup and took a drink to find out that it was indeed cold hot chocolate. I gulped it down anyways and padded into the kitchen to find the mess that deep down I knew would be there. It was her apartment, I wasn't going to tell her to clean up after herself, but I couldn't help but shake my head at how clear it made her morning routine. There was the big jar of hot chocolate mix that she had so carefully created, adding way more sugar than the recipe called for. The microwave door was open, a sign that she was too impatient to wait for the water to boil. There was a little ring of hot chocolate on the turntable inside said microwave, telling me that she had gotten distracted and left it in for too long, causing her drink to overflow. Feeling the stickiness on the mug in my hand was more proof that I was correct. The spoon she had used to stir the drink was stuck to the counter, completely forgotten. The cupboard was open, where she had probably looked for marshmallows and been unsuccessful, which explained the canister of whipped cream that sat on the counter next to the spoon. It was like a murder mystery in there, her little trail of breadcrumbs telling me exactly what she did after she woke up. I quickly cleaned up after her (because honestly it only would have taken her two seconds) and placed the mug in the sink before returning to the couch in the living room._

 _The dip caused by my sitting on the couch woke her up and she stretched like a feline, blinking a few times before those blue eyes finally met mine for the first time since last night. A slow smile grew on her face because she knew I hadn't ever seen this much snow._

 _"Did you look outside?!" If she were talking to me on the phone I never would have guessed she just woke up from a nap. She sounded wide awake._

 _"Yeah, it's crazy out there."_

 _"I'm definitely going to make you go play in the snow with me. But can we watch this movie first?" There was that hopeful look in her eyes. Saying no to that face was akin to telling a 4 year old there was no Tooth Fairy._

 _"What movie?" She had apparently already watched_ The Grinch _and I couldn't think of any other movies that she would want to see._

 _"The Grinch!" Oh._

 _"Didn't you just watch it?"_

 _"No. I mean yeah. But I fell asleep. And I want to watch it with_ you _." My heart fluttered and I shook my head at how I felt like such a teenager in love. I practically was at the time._

 _"Yeah, we can do that. Hold on though." I hopped up off the couch and grabbed a thick pair of socks and a blanket for myself because as much as we liked to share blankets, that white one was far too small and I would end up uncovered by the time the movie was half way over. I felt like I was forgetting something and looked around the room. When I saw her camera sitting on the bookshelf I grabbed it and made my way back to the living room. She was once again curled up and staring hard at the remote. There were only like two buttons that she actually used on the damn thing but it always took her a while to find them. I sneakily took a picture of her from the doorway and returned next to her on the couch._

 _A couple hours later, after listening to Piper recite nearly every line of the movie, I turned off the TV and stood, helping her up with me._

 _"So what is it you people do when it's this snowy outside?" I asked as I folded up my blanket and placed it next to hers that was strewn across the couch._

 _"_ You people?" _She questioned with mock offence before giggling at her own joke. "We get bundled up and have snowball fights and make snow angles and snowmen!" And with that, she was in the bedroom, throwing clothes out of the dresser haphazardly onto the bed. I stood with my arms crossed watching the events unfolding before me. The next thing I knew she was shoving an armful of clothing into my arms._

 _"Put this stuff on!" Her voice was oozing with excitement. She was understandably excited to be witnessing my first big snow. So far I was the one that had been introducing her to new things and not the other way around._

 _I was surprised to find that the clothes actually fit me as I stripped down and changed. Piper's back was to me. She seemed to be too excited to think about anything sexual._

 _Before she could rush us out into the perfect snow I stopped her to take a picture of the scene in front of us._

 _"I just want to get a picture before we leave tracks all over it and stuff." I answered her questioning look and she just smiled at me. As soon as the camera was back hidden in my jacket she ran (or did her best to run, but in the deep snow it was practically slow motion) and fell back into the snow, leaving a perfect Piper shaped imprint behind as she sunk to the ground. I shook my head in amazement at how someone like her could actually function as an adult because I was pretty sure she was a child and always would be. I was right._

 _I walked over and looked down at her to see her hands held up, finger tips barely sticking out of the hole that she had made. I hoisted her up easily, throwing her over my shoulder so she wouldn't ruin the design. This snow was a lot for me to take in. I wasn't sure if I was excited or nervous or what. But Piper wriggling out of my grasp and back onto the ground didn't give me time to decide. She began making a path in the snow and I followed her. She seemed to know exactly what she was doing, like this was a practiced routine. I pulled the camera back out and got a picture of her from behind, in her cute winter hat as she focused on making a path to nowhere in the deep snow._

 _Eventually I made a snowball without her noticing and threw it high up into the air, landing it right next to her with an almost fake sounding_ shoop _noise. She looked up into the sky and then over at me, then down at the hole in the snow and back up at me. She narrowed her eyes and before I knew what was happening she picked up a handful of snow and released it in my direction. It wasn't even a snowball, it was just a handful of snow that blanketed over my head and shoulders._

 _"Oh hell no." I easily pulled her down into the snow on top of me and we slowly sunk until I felt the snow packed under me._

 _After a good hour of freezing fun in the snow we ended up walking to a local bar. It was quite the journey to get there but when we were with each other we seemed to become more adventurous than usual. I stopped a couple along the way to get a photo for us with Piper's camera and they captured us kissing under a street light in a very cliché yet adorable photo._

 _She got more than buzzed while I sipped on a local beer, knowing that_ one _of us had to be sober to make it home alive. We would end up walking because as lucky as I was when it came to hailing cabs, there was no hope in this weather. She drank a fair amount of margaritas and her cheeks became more flushed with each one._

 _"Babe you should probably slow down if we're going to make it home," I had to be the voice of reason pretty often with her._

 _"Pfffft..." Okay, that was adorable. "You," she continued, clearly drunk at this point. "Are kind of. A party pooper."_

 _I pressed my lips together in an attempt to stifle my laughter because I knew it would just egg her on, but she saw right through it and tilted her head to the side with a crooked grin. So fucking adorable. I didn't know it was even possible for someone to be so cute._

 _"Come on, let's get you out of those wet clothes." I knew that would work. She immediately chugged the rest of her drink. Well, chugged was a generous word because most of it ended up dripping down the sides of her mouth and onto her sweater. I put her jacket on for her and slung her arm around my shoulder, guiding her the rest of the way home._

 _It was certainly a good thing that it was so cold outside and she was tipsy, because if she had seen the pink in my cheeks or noticed my fast pulse she probably would have pulled me into an alley and ripped off my only protection from the weather._

 _Once we made it inside we made our way to the couch and she put on a movie (_ I can't remember what it was after so many years) _and within 5 minutes she was already asleep, lightly snoring with her face pressed against the tattered leather couch. I took one more picture of the two of us, leaning over her with a dorky grin on my face as she began to drool on the couch. God, she was turning me into such a sap. I never would have taken a picture like that with anyone in my life until now. But I also couldn't remember being this happy in my life, so I guess it made sense._

The first picture made me pretty nostalgic. Looking at her backyard covered in snow brought back so many memories. We were practically invincible back then, never getting hangovers and able to stay up all night without feeling like dying. We could eat whatever we wanted without seeing the effects and could have conversations about the most stupid topics for hours on end.

The second picture brought an unstoppable grin to my face. She looked so small curled up on that couch under her favorite blanket. Her laugh lines weren't present and her skin glowed almost as much as it did when she was pregnant. There weren't any pictures of us around the house yet but we still had that mug that she used for her hot chocolate way back then. The blanket was folded in our closet right now, and I decided that I would pull it out tonight to sleep with. She was staring at that outdated remote like it owed her money.

The third picture was her in the snow with her back to the camera. There wasn't much to be said here. It just brought back the fond memories from that day. Her little red hat stood out and made the photo look way more artsy than it was intended to be.

The photo of us under the street light was one of Piper's favorites. I was usually a fan of the less forced photos where one of us wasn't expecting it or we weren't in a typical pose, but I had to agree that it was a great picture. My hands were on her waist and hers were on my cheeks. She was on her tip toes because even though she was almost the same height as me she always did that when we kissed. Her hat was crooked on her hair with a few strands of blonde hair peeking out and my dark hair was contrasted by the snowflakes that rested on my head. It was cliché and adorable and we both loved it.

I stared at the last photo and took in the beauty of it for a while. This was why I loved these unsuspecting photos so much. Her face was completely relaxed, cheeks still flushed from the drinks that night. I looked so fucking happy.

I smiled as I shut the book and got up from my spot on the floor, knees cracking and back burning from sitting in front of the fire so long. I put the album back into its spot on the shelf and poured myself a glass of wine, sitting on our couch as I waited for my wife to come home.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N:**

 **you guys are so fucking flattering! i didn't expect such a big response so fast. so sweet. thank you so much to every single person who reviewed, followed, and favorited already.**

 **so i'm going to change perspectives throughout the story (thanks to vausemaniac for that idea) instead of only telling it from alex's point of view. i think it'll be better this way. i'll also be skipping around the timeline of their lives (they got together in late 2000 so this takes place in the future) pretty randomly so if you have any requests please let me know.**

 **thanks to** **vausemaniac** **for writing such a long review despite being speechless... and then coming back to leave another one. and you actually don't need to apologize for rambling when you write a super long review that's basically just a huge compliment because it made me so happy.** **of course** **baby stuff is coming because what kind of monster would mention a pregnant piper and not follow up? you actually kinda predicted this next chapter, so good job :)**

 **also thanks to** **addictedtoOITNB** **. you're so fucking sweet. i'm not sure what else to say other than thanks a million times, but that would be a really long authors note so i won't. just pretend.**

I woke up before her as usual. I tried to stay in bed, I really did. It was Saturday and I felt like I should be trying to sleep in, but it was only 6:13 am and I was wide awake. I slipped out from under her arm and walked over to the bookshelf to find a book to read. What I found instead, though, was that damn picture of me completely passed out on the couch with Alex behind me wearing that shit eating grin. It made me shake my head and smile because it wasn't there yesterday which means she was looking through the photo albums again. And to think she told me I was spending too much time making them back then. What a sap.

I grabbed the photo and kissed a sleeping Alex on the forehead before making my way out to the living room to put the it back before it got ruined or lost. I placed the photo on the shelf where the albums sat and as I was reaching out to grab the correct one, my eyes flicked over to a different album. The one that made me the happiest and brought tears to my eyes at the same time. It was definitely worn after being pulled out to embarrass her on dates and during family gatherings. It was used even more the first few weeks after she went off to college. The cover was light blue and purple with lace surround the edge of the entire album. I carefully pulled out the album and took a seat in front of the fire, setting the book on my lap and running my fingers over the cover. I had to get back up to grab my reading glasses because I didn't want to miss any of the details in the photographs I was about to look at.

Instead of starting the album with a photo of her as a newborn like most people, I started it with when we found out I was pregnant.

 _I sat on the toilet and buried my face in my hands. I should have waited until she was home to do this. I'd been sitting here for so long that my legs were asleep but I was freaking out too much to stand up. Deep down I knew I wanted this, and hell if we didn't spend a lot of money to make it happen, but right now, sitting here alone, all I could think about was all the scary parts. I picked up the cup again and squinted at the test but the plus sign was still there. I nodded to myself, repeating_ okay, okay, okay _in my head over and over. I didn't know how long I sat on that damn toilet trying to calm down but I was unsuccessful until the second she walked in the door._

 _"Babe?" She called out and I heard her drop some bags onto the floor. I didn't give a shit what she did with the groceries, though. I quickly stood up but had to sit back down again because my legs were completely asleep. I grabbed the cup and felt the urge to hide it for some reason but I didn't because I could never hide anything from her._

 _"Al?" I responded tentatively. She walked in and saw me sitting there and raised an eyebrow to silently question what the hell I was doing in the bathroom. And it was seeing her face that finally got rid of my hesitation. I immediately regretted not thinking of a clever way to tell her. I mean, we had been trying for almost a year now, one would think I could have come up with something by now. Whatever._

 _I wordlessly held out my hand that held the cup with the test in it because there was a lump in my throat and I didn't want to talk or I knew would cry. She quickly grabbed the cup and saw that there was a test in it before returning her gaze to me. Her jaw was dropped now and she grabbed the test and held it up with a shaky hand. As soon as she saw the little plus sign she dropped the test and brought both her hands up to her face and covered her mouth and nose, leaving only her wide eyes exposed, but I could still tell she was smiling. I was smiling too now, for the first time since finding out. And then she was crying and I was crying and she was pulling me up and hugging me so fucking tight that I had to tap her on the back to get her to ease up. She got on her knees in front of me and kissed my stomach over and over until I grabbed her face and made her stand back up to kiss my lips instead._

 _"Did you make an appointment with the doctor?" Alex asked with a shaky voice because she was still crying. I just shook my head and wiped at the tears on my face, but it was pointless because they were still falling._

 _"How many tests did you take? Did you take different kinds? We need to call the doctor. I'll go call the doctor." I was laughing and crying now because usually I was the one that rambled but the tables had finally turned._

 _"I took 3 different tests." She pulled me into another bone crushing hug and the waterworks from both of us continued. She held up a finger and ran out of the room, only to come back quickly with my camera in her hand. We both wiped our fingers under our eyes to fix our makeup and I grabbed the test between my index finger and thumb. I held it up in the mirror and she snapped a photo of us in the reflection, teary eyed with huge smiles on our faces._

There were toothpaste specks on the mirror in the picture and you could see that lotion we always used to buy sitting on the counter. Our makeup was also strewn all over the counter because we would spend so much time getting ready that we never had time to properly put it away. Nowadays we just shared some eyeliner and mascara when we felt like putting in the effort. We both had pink cheeks from wiping our tears away and Alex was wearing her shirt from the restaurant. I spent a few minutes admiring my carefully cut out decorations on the page before moving on.

Back then I wasn't very happy about the pregnancy photos that Alex insisted on taking. There was no such thing as a filter or editing a photo and though even I had to admit I was glowing, I always put up a fight. The majority of the pictures she tried to take only showed me through the slits of her fingers because her hand was held up over the lens of the camera.

Most of the successful photos she ended up sneaking while I was asleep on the couch. That old couch did wonders for my back when I was pregnant so that's where I spent most of my time. Alex refused to let me sleep on it at night in fear that I would roll off, but during the day when she was home I would lay there for hours on end, watching TV or trying out new hobbies that I never stuck with, like knitting or making jewelry.

So since I was asleep in most of these photos obviously I didn't remember them being taken. I did, however, remember the first time I saw them.

 _I usually went to Costco with Alex. She would do the heavy lifting and always knew what brands of stuff I liked, even when I couldn't seem to remember. We would sneak extra free samples and pop out of aisles to scare each other like kids but somehow never got kicked out. This time I went alone because she had a potential investor coming to look at the restaurant that weekend and the trip couldn't wait any longer. I was pretty damn pregnant at that point, which didn't make things easier. I dropped off the film to be developed first and wandered off. I didn't have a grocery list because Alex would eat pretty much anything and it was impossible to predict what would make me nauseous these days. I was going through multiple rolls of toilet paper a day at the time thanks to the pregnancy so that was the only thing I knew we needed._

 _After buying an excessive amount of pickles and peanut M &Ms and completely forgetting the toilet paper that I went there for in the first place, I picked up the film and made my way out to the car. It was to the point where driving was hard because my stomach was sticking out so far. She was only okay with me driving when we needed something badly and it was a short trip. If I even barely leaned forward I could honk with no hands, something Alex found absolutely hilarious. _

_It wasn't until later that day when I remembered that I hadn't looked at the pictures. Alex was sitting by the fire (I didn't fight her for the spot because it was too uncomfortable to sit on the floor in my current pregnant state) and I was laying on the couch._

 _"Did you develop that film?" She asked with a slight smirk I could tell she was trying to keep off her face._

 _"Oh yeah. They're in my purse. Why?"_

 _"Did you look at them?" I narrowed my eyes and tried to sit up but it took me three tries thanks to my big belly and she made it up before me, running across the living room to snatch the envelope out of my purse._

 _"What did you do! You know the people look at them, right?" I asked, becoming a little bit nervous._

 _"It's nothing bad..." She turned away from my reach and started flipping through the photos._

 _I was quick enough to grab half of the stack from her left hand only to see a photo of me laying on the couch with my mouth open, clearly snoring in a deep slumber. It was definitely not flattering._

 _"What the fuck! Oh, you asshole." I continued to flip through only to see more photos of a similar nature. There wasn't a single picture in there that I knew had been taken. That sneaky fucker._

 _"I needed to document your baby bump!" She reasoned defensively, snatching the rest of the photos away from me before I could try to get rid of them. "Seriously, you'll thank me when we're all old and wrinkly and you have proof that this kid actually lived in you at one point."_

 _I sighed, knowing she was right as usual. She smiled triumphantly, knowing that I knew she was right._

And of course she was right, because when I sat down to make the baby scrapbook I included almost every photo that I had developed that day.

My favorite was the one where I was laying on my back, head propped up by a decorative pillow. My tank top was rolled up leaving my belly completely uncovered. I was probably 5 or 6 months pregnant judging by the size of my belly. Our cat, Puck (yes, from _A Midsummer Night's Dream_ ) was curled up on my stomach protectively, staring at Alex as she took the picture. I was asleep, which is the only reason she got the picture, with my head turned to face her. I actually looked pretty peaceful for a pregnant girl sleeping on a couch with a cat on her stomach.

There was another picture of me on the lounge chair out on the deck with a lemonade in my hand. I was facing the backyard but she had managed to almost get my profile without me noticing. I was wearing my favorite maternity sweater and a pair of Alex's shorts that I had stretched out gradually since my baby bump started growing. My hair was windblown and I was looking off at something in the distance. It almost looked staged, and I silently thanked god that Alex was brave enough to risk pissing me off when I was pregnant to capture that moment.

"Busted," Alex's singsong voice caused me to actually jump. I had been in such a trance staring at the photos that I didn't realize it was already well past 9 in the morning. I was pretty sure she was becoming more attractive as she aged, if that was possible. Her eyes were still clear as day, alabaster skin still flawless, hair still jet black thanks to my handy dyeing skills.

"You started it, I found that picture on the bookshelf when I woke up." I said knowingly.

She took a seat next to me and her knees cracked.

"When did I get so fucking old?" She sighed and I leaned my head against her shoulder, moving the album so it balanced between our knees.

"You aren't old. If you're old that means I'm old." She raised her eyebrows knowingly and I smacked her arm before flipping the page in the album. We both stared at the picture of the moment our lives changed forever.

 _Giving birth was a total bitch. I mean, I knew it would be, but god damn. I was in labor for a whopping 14 hours and Alex sat, stood, and paced next to me the whole time. I was being impossible and I knew it, but she wasn't the one suffering for 14 hours, not to mention the previous 9 months. My parents didn't come. It kind of sucked but honestly my mother's ridicule for my constant cursing would have made the whole situation a lot worse. Diane was there, but she was keeping her distance. She knew how I could get so it was probably out of fear, now that I thought about it. Alex ran back and forth getting ice chips and rubbed my arm and pulled my hair back like the perfect wife. Which made it even more surprising when I started pushing and she passed out for a good 5 minutes. Luckily for both of us she was back up just in time to watch her daughter be born._

 _We named her Samantha but she went by Sam as soon as she was old enough to decide. I think it was because she wanted to shorten her name like Alex, but she wouldn't admit it even once she was a teenager. We slept together on the hospital bed that night with Sam being watched over by the nurses and it was definitely one of our last sound sleeps for at least 6 months._

Diane was the one who took the picture. I was laying on my back on the hospital bed with Sam tucked under my arm. Alex had managed to fit on the bed as well. She was laying on her stomach with her face pressed into the pillow and her arm draped protectively over the two of us. My hair was a mess and I was still wearing the hospital gown and Alex was still wearing black skinny jeans and her leather jacket. Pure exhaustion.

I kept my head leaned on her shoulder as we stared at the picture in silence. Sam was so _tiny_ and we both looked so _young._ But it still felt like yesterday. It was almost unfathomable that it was 19 years ago and our little baby was in _college_ now _._

Alex flipped the page to a photo of us sleeping on the couch this time, another piece of Diane's work. She always captured the best moments. It struck me as a little strange that we slept on the couch so much with such a big bed in just the other room, but at the time it made sense.

 _I always had this feeling that I would be lucky and end up with the perfect, easy, quiet baby. Boy was I wrong. Alex warned me, too._ You're way too high maintenance to have an easy kid, _she joked. I should have appreciated sleep while I had it, because_ damn. _We only had one kid for a reason, and that 6 months was it. She was so incredibly fussy and refused to sleep whenever we needed her to the most. It was only the second day being home and we were both practically zombies. I was getting used to breastfeeding and Alex was a diaper changing prodigy, but getting Sam to go to sleep was insanely difficult. We did discover a few tricks, like driving around the neighborhood for hours, knowing that if we stopped the car she would wake up. The gas money was worth it._

 _She was about 6 and a half months when she began sleeping through the nights and dear god were we thankful. I remember laying in bed so excited to sleep that I actually_ couldn't _sleep. Alex was a lifeless lump laying face down on the bed, no doubt drooling all over the pillow. She had been sleeping even less than me because of her dedication to both our family and the restaurant. Eventually I did fall asleep, though, and I think it was the best sleep of my life. I vaguely remembered waking up once to go pee and hearing Alex talking. I couldn't figure out if she was sleep talking or if I was so tired that her words made no sense, but I passed back out as soon as I laid down._

 _It was the next morning when Diane came over for lunch. We scrambled around to clean up the house because even though we knew she wouldn't judge us, we didn't want her to see how bad it had gotten over the last few months. I wasn't the best at housekeeping so I did my best while Alex trailed behind me, refolding blankets and moving things to their actual places. Sam was in her chair bouncing away, throwing toys and then whining until we gave them back to her, only to throw them back on the ground with adorable laughter. I blamed Alex for her fucked up sense of humor._

 _When we finally had the house somewhat cleaned up I lay down on the couch, reaching out and flexing my fingers while making a pouty face at Alex. Of course she laid down with me. I flipped through the channels to put on something childish for Sam and we spooned on the couch while making fun of the_ Sesame Street _characters. The next thing I knew a bright flash woke me up and Diane was standing in front of the TV making an_ oh shit _face._

 _"Sorry kiddo, I didn't know the flash was on." Her voice was what woke Alex up._

 _"Hmwhat the fuck?" She sat halfway up and glanced up at her mom before laying back down. "Hi mom."_

"I miss that couch." Alex broke the silence while still looking at the picture. I hummed my agreement and she kissed me on the cheek.

When Sam left for Columbia (yes a fucking Ivy League because she's so brilliant) we spent at least a week moping around the house, looking at old photographs and watching home videos from when she was a kid. The whole place seemed so damn quiet without her and the memories helped us transition. Alex did her best to pretend to be okay, she really did, but it was so obvious how much she missed Sam whenever I looked into her eyes. Not that we weren't ecstatic about her success because we took every provided chance to brag about her to our friends and family.

We watched every single home video (which was hours upon hours of footage) multiple times as we cuddled up on the floor and laughed and cried together.

There was the one where she had the chicken pox and Alex told her to show them to the camera.

 _I knew this day would come. I hoped it would so she wouldn't get them as an adult and have it way worse. But she got them_ bad. _I mean, she was more chicken pox than normal skin for a while there. We gave her multiple baths a day with that nasty oatmeal stuff and rubbed all sorts of creams and lotions on her. She was definitely a trooper._

 _Alex insisted on getting footage of this so we could show her just how bad she had it for that long week. She was 5 years old at the time. I was sitting on the couch making a grocery list while Sam played with her stuffed animals on the floor when Alex came in with the camcorder._

 _"You wanna show future Sam your chicken pox?" Alex asked as she squinted at the camcorder and figured out how to turn it on. She had used it a million times but it always took her a while._

 _Sam nodded, but she wasn't as enthusiastic as she usually was. These things were taking a serious toll on her fluffy personality. Alex held up the camcorder and Sam immediately grabbed the hem of her shirt and lifted it to cover her face, completely flashing the camera. Her entire torso was covered in those damn chicken pox._

 _"Woooah there!" Alex's voice came from behind the camera and caused me to look up and see what our little angel was doing this time._

 _"Sam!" I laughed and pulled her shirt back over her torso._

 _"That's one to show to her first boyfriend," Alex muttered._

 _"What? I'm showing fusure Sam."_

 _"Future," Alex corrected. We always corrected her when she said words wrong so she didn't learn them the wrong way._

 _"Future." Sam repeated thoughtfully, obviously trying to ingrain the word into her head. She went back to playing with her stuffed animals and Alex filmed her for a good 5 minutes before turning off the camcorder. She was so good at capturing those natural moments._

Sure enough,we showed that one to her first serious boyfriend while Sam hid her face in her hands and he furiously blushed. Alex and I were crying with laughter and she rewound the cassette twice before Sam couldn't take it anymore and they rushed out of the house.

There was the video where I walked around with the camcorder to film the entire house so we could show her what it looked like when she was growing up. It was right around the time Sam was learning how to use sarcasm. She got it from Alex, and for nearly a year every word from her mouth was just dripping with sarcasm.

 _The camcorder was facing the ground when I turned it on._

 _"Alex, can you help me?" I called out and muttered a few curse words under my breath while I tried to figure out how to turn on the device that was already on. Her feet came into view on the carpet._

 _"Babe, here." The camcorder was now directed at my legs as she looked at the screen. "It's already on you dork."_

 _She handed it back to me and I turned the camera upright to show her smirking face._

 _"And now your technological struggles have been documented forever." She must have seen the look on my face because she pressed her lips together and held her hands up in surrender before retreating to wherever she was before I asked her for help._

 _"Okay Sam, this is what our house looked like in 2014." I aimed the camera toward the living room and spun a slow circle. Our fireplace had a stack of books and magazines next to it with a pair Alex's glasses on top. There was the of slippers that Alex and I often fought over instead of just buying another pair and a stack of blankets folded in the corner. I had tried to tidy the place up a bit before making the video._

 _I walked through the hallway and focused on the photos of Alex and I and Sam on the wall, pausing for the longest on a few pieces of Sam's artwork from school. I peeked into our daughter's room and she was sitting on her bed with a coloring book._

 _"Hey Sammy, say hi to the camera." I put the camera right in her face and it made her giggle._

 _"Hi to the camera," She responded with an imitation of Alex's smirk on her face._

 _"So tell us what you're doing," I prompted to try to get her talking in front of the camera._

 _"I'm coloring." She gave me her best_ duh _look._

 _"Ah, our brooding 8 year old artist."_

 _"You're weird mom." She returned to coloring and I kept the camera on her for a few minutes as she worked._

 _I slowly rotated the camera around the room. She had a bookshelf - full of reading material made for kids way older than 8 years old - and a beanbag in the corner where she would sit to read. There was a small easel the other corner where she would paint when she was feeling extra creative. There were visible paint splatters on the wall behind it from the time she tried to splatter paint after getting her hands on a magazine that introduced her to Jason Pollock. We made her scrub for hours but the red splatters only turned a light shade of pink._

 _"Mom is it lunch time?" I flipped the camera around to show her face again._

 _"I don't know, should we go bug your mother?" She was standing up before I even finished talking. She absolutely_ adored _Alex._

 _We made our way through the hallway and into the kitchen where Alex was washing dishes. Sam held up her finger to her lips and snuck up behind her mother._

 _"Mama!" Alex jumped up and dropped her plate in the sink before spinning around._

 _"Jesus! Oh you little shit." We didn't usually curse around her but she knew not to repeat the words and Alex had clearly just been scared to death. She grabbed the spray nozzle from the sink and wrapped her arm around Sam's shoulders to hold her in place and pressed the trigger, completely soaking our daughter, who was now shrieking and laughing as she tried to escape her mom's death grip._

The video cut out there because there was no way I was missing out on all that fun if the kitchen was already soaked.

"Should we call her?" I asked this question a lot. We both wanted to call her every second of every day, but we knew she needed her space to become an adult.

"She's probably hungover, its before noon on a Saturday."

"Our little angel? Never," I pretended to be appalled but we both knew Alex was probably right. She pulled out her phone anyways, putting it on speaker as soon as it started ringing. I wiggled my toes with excitement, praying that she would answer so I could hear her voice.

"Hmmom?" Yeah, we woke her up. She'd get over it.

"Hi baby!" I squealed into the phone and she groaned loudly.

"Oh our little college partier, I'm so proud." Alex chuckled and I grabbed the phone out of her hand.

"How are you? How is school? You better be getting good grades if you're out partying all night."

"Mom I'm getting good grades. I'll snapchat you a picture of my last test grade."

"What is a snapchat?" I looked at Alex but she just shrugged.

"Oh my god, never mind. I'm doing well in school."

"So tell us what you've been doing?" Alex chipped in.

"I don't know, studying a lot. Oh, I joined this club called cupid. It's uhh.. Columbia University partnership for umm.. international development."

I squealed with excitement only to hear another groan from Sam on the other end. I always knew she would do something cool like that when she got to college. She was so brilliant and caring.

"Can I call you guys later? I'm kind of dying right now." I could hear running water over the line, but I wasn't sure if she was getting a glass of water or getting ready to take a shower.

"We miss you," Alex uttered into the phone.

"I miss you guys too. I'll call you later or tomorrow or something. Love you guys."

I leaned my head back on Alex's shoulder and we sat in silence for a few minutes before I came up with an idea.

"Let's send her a care package! When I was in college my parents never did it but my roommate always got them. You put like snacks and pictures and socks and stuff in it. You know, mom stuff."

She linked our fingers and brought our hands up to kiss my knuckles.

"Alright, let's do it."


End file.
